Pride and Prejudice

Pride and Prejudice

Jane Austen, 1813 (first published)
T. Egerton, Whitehall (original publisher), 272 pgs (Dover ed.) 

A classic romance novel that needs no introduction, Jane Austen's Pride and Prejudice is one of the most popular classic novels of the 20th century. It's estimated to date that it as sold more than 20 million copies since the first publication in 1813. Has sparked many movies, numerous adaptations, and is the second most beloved book in the United Kingdom (first being Lord of the Rings). I had never read any of Jane Austen's works and wanted to pick a well-known and very well received romantic tale of self growth and courtship for my "good" Valentine's Day pick. The book also presented a challenge as I am unfamiliar with Early English Language (the oldest book I've ever read to date was A Moveable Feast, published in 1976 and written in the 1920's by some American dude named Hemingway.) I was determined to jump into a classic book with both feet, and see if I could wade through the language of early 19th Century English language. I mean, I've seen enough Downton Abbey. It couldn't be any more confusing, right? 

Well, funny you should mention that... 

As most of you are aware of the plot of this book, I will try to give it the shortest summary possible, since most of us already know what happens at the end, I will forgo my oath just this once and summarize the entire novel, that being said: THIS WILL CONTAIN SPOILERS. So if you haven't read the book, or, if you've read the book and just want to get to the good stuff, you may skip the next few paragraphs. 

The story focuses on the Bennett Family, who have 5 daughters (oldest to youngest) Jane, Elizabeth (protagonist, witty, smart, yet prejudiced), Mary, Kitty, and Lydia. They are all hoping to be wed soon as Mr. Bennett will die and of course this being pre-women's rights, will lose their inheritance/land if not passed to another married male. (Which, I mean, is such fucking bullshit, right?) Mr. Bingley (wealthy, handsome, charming) moves into the estate next door (Netherfield) with his sister Caroline and his friend, Mr Darcy (brooding, prideful, party pooper.) They invite the Bennett's to a dance, Mr Darcy is being a party pooper and won't dance with anyone, Mr Bingley falls for Jane, Jane secretly loves Mr Bingley but is playing hard to get, Elizabeth thinks Darcy a dickhole.
Jane rides over to Netherfield, catches cold and cannot come home, Elizabeth walks over there to care for her,  Caroline opens the door, sees Elizabeth looking less then refined in a muddy dress. Immediately despises her. Darcy sees Elizabeth, finds this incredibly hot. Is taken by her, Elizabeth still thinks Darcy is a dickhole. Caroline (who is in love with Darcy. Don't worry if this is getting too confusing, because I was wicked confused too.) despises Elizabeth even more.

Meanwhile, Mr. Collins (Clergyman, an idiot who says he despises books, the heir to the Bennett estate) comes to visit, finds his cousin Elizabeth attractive and proposes to her (ew ew ew ew ew) She refuses. the wounded Collins decides to bounce back and proposes to her best friend, Charlotte (kind, intelligent, but poor daughter of local Knight.) Meanwhile,The Bennett family entertains a militia stationed nearby, One of them is named Wickman, who tells Elizabeth about how Mr. Darcy is an ass to his servants and swindled him out of his rightful inheritance. Elizabeth further finds Darcy to be the ultimate dickhole.

Darcy and the Bingley's return to London after the summer, Jane becomes upset as he left without proposing or admitting his love to her. It's reviled later that Mr Darcy helped in convincing Mr Bingley to not marry her. So a few weeks later Jane decides to visit friends in London and hopes to run into Mr Bingley. She meets up with Caroline who acts like an ass to Jane (because Darcy is now in love with her sister Elizabeth and not herself. and the fact the the Bennets are on a lower class system than the Bingleys.) Tells Jane about Darcy's role in not proposing to her. Mr Bingley never sees her. Jane is tossed into depression. Elizabeth visits Collins and Charlotte at her aunts house (Lady Catherine de Bourgh.) Darcy visits her aunt and sees Elizabeth, both start spending more time together. Darcy proposes to Elizabeth in a not very kind manner ("I think you're rad, but your family is pretty poor and kinda awful. But I can try to look past that." PRIDE!) Elizabeth obviously refuses, calls him out on being a dickhole, tells him that he was responsible for breaking up Jane and Bingley, being an asshole to his servants, and swindling Wickman out of inheritance. Darcy responds telling Elizabeth that Wickman traded inheritance for cash payment, squandered all his money, ran off to war, then when couldn't get back into his inheritance tried to marry his sister. He foiled that plan and now Wickman hates him for it. As for Bingley and Jane, Darcy states that Jane showed no interest in Bingley,  as well as Elizabeth's parents acting very desperate, took to think they were golddiggers too and bro'd Bingley out on the info to prevent heartbreak. Elizabeth then sees the err of her ways by pre-judging him (PREJUDICE!) and has second thoughts about Darcy.

bah, this is getting too long, basically all you need to know at this point is that Wickman is a dickhead, Darcy was right, Elizabeth gets over herself and decides to marry dark and mysterious Darcy. Everyone is happy.

House of Leaves

This is not for you.


House of Leaves
Zampanò 
intro by Johnny Truant
Mark Z. Danielewski, 2000
Randomhouse (Pantheon), 707 pgs.

This book and myself go way back. I believe it's best to start off this blog truthfully. I did not finish this book. I have tried to read this book 7 or 8 times, and it creeps me out so much that I cannot will myself to finish it completely. It changes your perspective of thinking, it takes you in and will not let you go. 

The house will swallow you (w)hole.

I cannot describe this book, so this review will be the most lackluster thing you will ever read from me. It's a maze, and a love story, and a horror story. Both fake and real (so real) at the same time. The best way I can describe it?  It's a book with 3 narrators (4 if you count the editors) The first narration is from Johnny Truant, who comes across the now diseased Zampano's in progress paperwork about a nonexistent movie called The Navidson Record. Within this, The Navidson Record is a documentary about a family who purchases a house in Virginia to try and save their flailing marriage and family. After a weekend away, they come back to the house and realize something is off. There is a door where there wasn't one before. 

Gradually- and frankly- weird shit starts to happen. The 2 most well known things (without giving too much of the book away) is that the interior of the house is slowly, slowly growing bigger and bigger while the exterior stays the same size and shape. The first of these changes is a doorway that is bigger than the exterior of the house by 5/16'', then becomes the "Five and a Half Minute Hallway" whereas a long, deeply inky dark, cold, and silent hallway opens up where there should logically be a wall. As there's no protrusions on the exterior. 

Between what's going on with the actual pseudo analysis, our unreliable narrators Johnny (as showcased by his Courier New font) and the editors (showcased by Times New Roman font.) the book becomes scattered, confusing, claustrophobic. Thus making the book one of the most popular types of New Media/Ergodic Literature in the last 10 years.

At its core, I believe this book is a love story. Do not ask me why, but I became obsessed with House of Leaves. I would stay up late into the hours of the night, feign sickness in order to spend a whole day in it's company. This lasted 15 days until I started to become ill while - and for a few hours after - reading this book. I cannot explain why, but I felt like the world was closing in on me, or I could actually FEEL Johnny's pain and suffering while he was reading the same text. Needless to say, it all got too creepy for me, and I had a life to work on. So I only got to 300 pages before I put the book down. I feel like a failure. House is still sitting on my bookshelf, with the half full notebook with all the notes and things highlighted in it so I could decipher some pages. She sits there and stares at me, knowing I will eventually return and start all over again. I will be continuously stuck in her labyrinth until the end of time.
In short, this is a book not to be messed with or taken lightly. It will eat you up and spit you out. It will feel real (Even though it's a work of extremely awesome fiction, a la Blair Witch Project scale.) but you have to keep telling yourself "It's only a book....It's only a book.....It's only a book...."



Book Haiku

                             

                                             

                         

Night Film

Night Film

Marisha Pessl, 2013

Random House, 602 pgs.


This book is the reason why you should never underestimate the artists who make book covers. If the cover wasn't intriguing to me when I was glancing over the New Releases" in my local bookstore, I would have never picked it up and read the dust jacket synopsis.

It was love at first sight, after immediately purchasing it, I raced home to read it. It took me 1 week to finish the book, and 2 weeks to prepare a haiku and write the review. After careful consideration and many drafts, I decided to re-read the book again. Just to be sure I had everything I wanted to say written down. I hardly ever re-read a book.

Seriously people, it was that good.

The book starts out with a questionable suicide of a 24 year old piano prodigy named Ashley Cordova, who is the only daughter of very famous cult cinema giant Stanislas Cordova; An incredibly well known recluse who is legendary for his explicit and terrifyingly realistic horror films. Our hero is Scott McGrath, a well known investigative journalist whose career took a severe burn by trying to uncover the true nature of the Cordova family. Scott believes with all this heart that Ashley was murdered by Cordova and/or his associates, and- with the help of two young, offbeat, questionable cohorts- thus starts a thrilling, chilling, spellbinding mystery though NY state where we are thrown somewhere between suspension of disbelief, and absolute reality.

It's hard to really discuss this book without spoiling some of what happens. As it is my supreme objective to not ruin a book, nor give any sort of spoilers, I will only give broad, confusing, mysterious reasons as to why I enjoyed this book.

This is a book about finding the truth, as you see it. At least that's what I took away from it. You are tossed about on this journey of false leads and dead ends, but if you read between the lines you will eventually understand the beauty that was the end of this book. A read a lot of reviews and the general consensus is that the ending fell short. But, if reading deeper into it, it was the perfect way to end it. (I know, confusing right? You'll understand if you pick it up and read it.) This book is a ride, a hell of a ride. There were only a few instances where it was getting slow or something became unbelievable to me, but at that point(s) in the story is where the fun part comes in. It's a tale. A fiction. You are supposed to suspend disbelief for a while and just enjoy where this book takes you. If you don't then you're not reading it correctly. It's meant to frighten, to excite, to humiliate the reader. It tricks you in the best way possible.

Pessl is a wonderful writer, she crafted a dark, richly detailed, elaborate literary mystery novel. I love her use of multi-media and unconventional ways to write a book. It was very "House of Leaves". Astounding, I cannot get enough of her. The book instructs you to download the free "Night Film" App in order to discover more clues or go in depth about the clues in the book. The app could still use some work and I believe she or the publisher could have taken it further but it's a great little addendum to an already excellent book. That being said, this is the way a mystery novel should be written in this digital age.

Other than some complications with the app, the only thing I didn't enjoy is her overuse of italics. Most seemed unnecessary. Especially when every other word is italicized. It started to feel hokey. But please don't let this stop you from enjoying this book. If you're a film fan, a mystery fan, a horror buff, or some hipster who is sick and tired of talking about House of Leaves or Ayn Rand novels, go read this book. 





Book Haiku (for the people who have read the book)

Do I dare disturb?

To go where the mermaids lie. 

To find the real truth?



Book Haiku (for the people who haven't read the book)

Go ingest this book.

No. Seriously. Take heed.

And go read this book.